August 7, 2015

Glow in the Dark!

She was in a dark tunnel, away from light for such a lengthy time that she could not recollect how much time had passed. It just felt like eternity. It was so long that she had forgotten what LIGHT felt like. She couldn’t reminisce what it felt to sense the WIND. It was DARK for so long that she didn’t recollect a clearer vision. She wondered what it was to have a clear pathway without stones and thorns. She failed to recall a life without agony.

Like always, initially, there was HOPE. HOPE that she will escape the dungeon and have a better life, HOPE that she will discover the LIGHT once more, a HOPE that she could be for once cheerful and carefree. Alas! With passing time and struggle, with isolation and nightmares she didn’t realize as to when HOPE was replaced by FEAR. For her, now HOPE ceased to exist only to swap with FEAR OF THE UNKNOWN.

FEAR of having to permanently live in captivity of negative circumstances, FEAR of being bound to darkness forever, Fear of having only a mere determination in life, that to get out of the chaos. FEAR, that the lines of struggle and creases of pain were now evident in her skin and face. Finally, with the passing time and long ordeal she had reached a juncture, where FEAR too gradually perished.

She couldn’t comprehend how or when, but this dark tunnel had indeed transformed into an entire life. “HER ENTIRE LIFE”. The burrow from which she yearned to get out someday, the darkness she had thought she would fight off, the pain & suffering she thought would in due course subside had sadly turned out to be her entire life.

After the lengthy struggle, she had managed to convince herself that this was the END. She came in terms with reality, got used to the shadow, the coarse path, putrid air and a land without rain. She embraced the life of long enduring pain and trauma only to be stunned to see something awaiting ahead.

She didn’t know as to how it was possible for her to see things clearly in the pathway ahead. But, there it was! When she least expected it or probably did not want it anymore. When HOPE had died and LIFE had lost its meaning, there was the LIGHT! She could see a ray, a ray of sunshine. She could see the greenery, she could feel the wind brushing against her now grey hair.

She was right when she deemed it as THE END! It was an end indeed! But, there was LIGHT at the end of the tunnel. She stepped out of darkness and the light engulfed her. It was a sight to watch.
You really could not tell who wanted whom more. She wanted the LIGHT or did the LIGHT want to shine on her.

P.S: This article is a mere figment of my imagination of how there always will be happiness around albeit hidden. Your struggle may be too lengthy, may seem meaningless and you could succumb to being pessimistic and depressed. But, you just have to go with the flow, be optimistic because you do sooner or later reach a place in Life where there is a very bright LIGHT! LIGHT that will no more diminish.
I do see the ray today! My Ray of Sunshine!

Cheers to Life,


June 12, 2015

All that you are!!

You are not,
The inaccessible shooting star I saw from the park,
Or the magnificent fireworks that sparkles in the sky so dark!

You are not,
The mad rush of a tequila shot with a lime,
Or the smell of a dish garnished with thyme!

You are not,
The colorful rainbow far out of my reach,
Or the delicate sand castles built on a beach!

You are the instrumental music I listen to when I am distressed,
You are the soothing cup of tea when I am stressed!
You are my woolen blanket in times that are cold,
You are a priceless jewel, not just ordinary Gold!
You are the gentle wind that brushes through my tresses,
You are everything I need and in abundance!!!

P.S: Four years into wedding, A blog was the least of the things I could dedicate to my husband;)

Happy Anniversary to both of us,
Haritha :)

May 16, 2015

An ode to Kindness

How would you like to be amongst people who are kind and generous? Great, isn't it? People who go in lengths to make you feel comfortable, who do not have a word “NO” in their dictionary? It would be awesome. Life will be uncomplicated. But, there is something that irks me about kindness. Something about it is very difficult.

A little kindness will surely feel nice. Then a little more of it, could invariably be a part of you or your personality. But, after a point wouldn't you expect kindness in return? Believe, me there are some who can be astonishingly unselfish. The ones who do not believe in this concept of return on investment. Others negligence somehow doesn't bother them but it infuriates me to see their kindness being taken for granted.

It bothers me how undeterred can these ‘KIND’ people be. Taking setbacks time after time and yet continue facing all the odds with a smile. Sometimes not being taken seriously enough because at the fag end its understood that this person will not create any fuss.  Most of us probably are the ones who “return the sentiment”. I for one, will always be a mirror image of who you are to me. You are kind I will be extremely sensitive to you. You mess up? Then I would ensure to make you feel the same. Why, you ask? Because that is the most easy way to move on, according to me.

What does you continue being kind despite knowing that people around you are a little meaner, a little more selfish, make you? I worry about this all the time for that one person. Does that make this person a fall guy?  Some people you come across are so virtuous that I worry if they will get all the goodness in return. I fear that these people who do not realize that their goodness will be forgotten amongst selfishness, jealousy and greed. They do not realize that world can be a mean place not because they are low on intelligence or impractical, but because they genuinely have a good heart. I wonder how they manage to keep their innocence at bay in this cruel world.

Even though I find it difficult to see them being nice, I guess their goodness does weave some magic in me. When I find the world nasty and callous, their conviction allows me to see the other side of the coin. When I worry being taken for granted, their presence reassures me that you can certainly be above these trivial things.  When I opine that my goodness may not be returned their actions reminds me that it will never go wasted.

I believe they are like those fragile beautiful roses that somehow willfully forget being surrounded by thorns. They bloom beautifully and spread their fragrance. But, fail to realize that slowly they will be exhausted, fade and eventually wither away. And, it will be the thorns that triumph.

 I worry for them, watch their every move to be able to warn them about the danger that lies ahead. Meanwhile, they astonish me with the strength they have in them to be untouched by this cold-hearted world.  They remind me that it’s easier being kind without regret than react only because one worries getting hurt. They assure me that it is all about spreading love and that I would get it back in ten folds. They remind me that it is about how warm you make people around you feel. For, it is only then that there will be some goodness left.

They remind me that in being a little more empathetic and sensitive your loved ones will know how much you love them, in case the sun would not rise tomorrow.

Thanking that one person for helping me cherish the goodness in me,

May 11, 2015

Intricate thoughts# 7

‘Grieving is very important’, she said.Vital to remain sane. She claimed it is a proof that she has let it go, let it pass. It’s an indication that she has accepted the harsh reality. The kid remained silent. Nodded his head. He was too young to even comprehend what he was being told. Now, it was another’s turn to console him on the loss of a loved one. They advised on how he should remain strong. He hung his head down staring at the ground, impassive.

Hundreds came and left. Some spoke in lengths others advised. Some cried hugging him, others just patted and walked away.

At night as he lay wide awake staring at the ceiling, inexpressive, he wondered whom is it that he should grieve for. The parent he lost or himself for having to live without them?

Just like the kid in the narration above, I often wonder, whom is it that one grieves for? Is it for the loved one on how his/her dreams will always remain incomplete? Or, is it for oneself on how can we continue living in their absence?

Do we grieve for that person saddened on how soon had death embraced them? Or, do we sympathize ourselves on why do we have to go through all this?

It is 99% always about us, isn’t it?

Mostly, we feel distraught about our own situation than of the person who actually passed away. We miss what they would have said, we miss what they would have cooked and we miss how much we would have been loved and cared for. We would not miss advising them but what they would have told. We would not miss accompanying them but being accompanied. We would not miss on how they would have been happy around us but vice versa.

 Is functioning this way, being selfish? Or is it just another miserable trait of being human?

Do you have a take on this?

April 1, 2015

An open letter to the entire team of My body, My Mind, My choice!

Oh! I so loved the way this video was taken. Unconventional and Eccentric. My favorite scene in the video has to be the last one with Deepika’s hair acting against the gravity quoting ‘I am the universe Infinite in every direction.’ I loved most of the lyrics but the ones I despised were probably the ones that if fine-tuned could make a deeper impact.

I totally approve when the video claims that the clothes you wear or the size you are, is all your own choice. This makes total sense because there have been many occasions when I have dressed as expected by others and ended up feeling annoyed at them and myself. I have already come to an understanding that their mind is caged and that I will not let mine be, despite knowing that this is a struggle that I will have to endure.

One’s partner is one’s choice. Irrespective of the fact that you are a Female, Male or a third gender, whom you choose as your partner is totally your choice. The gender of the person you love or you will marry too is your choice. People will have opinions, suggestions and advice but the bottom-line is that it is always your choice.

I am on the same page as you when you state that the Bindi, the surname change (Which I never did and was never asked to) are all signs of oppression. There are girls who are happy doing it, go ahead. But do not judge the women who do not abide by it. I don’t trust that my husband’s well-being is decided by the ornament I wear on my neck. Because if that is so, it should apply to him. The chain exchanged in the wedding should decide the fate of both. Why mine alone? These are just not my cup of tea. If it is yours. Drink it. I will never judge you.

Getting married or not; Being in a live-in or not; having a baby after marriage or not having it at all, is certainly a choice. But, never mine alone. It is also my partner’s. Love and respect is of relevance too, isn't it? This is where the video went wrong.
If it is my choice to have an affair outside my marriage, what in the world will stop him?
If I choose to love him temporarily, what role does honesty play in a relationship?
If he is my choice out of 7 billion, why am I forgetting that I need to be chosen by him too?

I might be the urban woman who do not believe in the Bindi and Mangalsutra ways. But, that doesn't shake my belief from the institution of marriage. If I demand to be respected and loved, I owe the same to my partner. There is no second thought about it. I cannot have my ways and call him a male chauvinist when he tries to have his own. 

On one hand, Mr Homi Adjania, chose to make a movie like Cocktail which proclaims that a guy is the one who always chooses. Out of the two, he chooses the girl who doesn't really make her own choices as opposed to the one who is tagged outrageous for living life her way. And on the other hand, he makes a video like this for Vogue that it is all about the choices of a woman. Or, so he claims. There is a lengthy celebrity list who rendered their support to this video and some have told all who oppose this video to ‘go get a life’. Seriously??? I am not trying to bring in any emotional point of Indian culture in here. It doesn't matter to anybody how many people you have a relationship with or the number of people you marry. But, it does matter to that partner of yours. You are accountable and loyal to him just as much as he is liable. 

I was worried if this women empowerment jargon was off late becoming more of a statement than a serious social concern. With the above video, my fears have become a reality. There is a rebellious wave that is generated in the social media that I have been noting. All of a sudden, everybody seems to have an opinion on everything, which is good, but only if done with thorough introspection. Videos like this, doesn't make any sense and would only lead to a downfall with our youth believing in it.

It is indeed my body, my mind and my choice. But, why overlook his preferences calling it women empowerment?
If I, expect to be treated right, I got to treat him correct too.
If I, expect to be given freedom, I have to know what it essentially means.
If I, expect to have a loyal partner, I need to learn that there somewhere lies a give and seek policy to it.

As far as individual self is concerned, nothing can come in the way of your video but when you talk relationship there are two parties and mutual consent is essential. The video missed the crux, when it spoke of relationships or marriage. Loyalty, Honesty, Respect are all the foundations. You do not necessarily have to be a Man or a Woman to abide by it. 

Feminism is never ever about demeaning the other gender, but about ensuring both of them have equal privileges.

P.S: Lots of articles are written attacking Deepika Padukone. Just want to bring it to your notice that she is just one of the 99 faces you see in the video. Do not hold her alone responsible.